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My Experience With The Two Fat Women From Hell.

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Am so sorry to all my blog readers for not fulfilling my promise,but yay! here i am,.from now onward i pledge to blog frequently every week no matter what is may take.How was your Christmas and New year break,your family,your siblings,your husbands and wives.Hope your business is moving to its permanent site?.Well what you are about to read below is what happened to me on wednesday.Enjoy!     
Please don't misquote me,its not like i hate fat people but i just think that there should be a small world for this people.when u finish reading this post i am sure most of you will agree with me.Last year december 19th i was the happiest person in  this world when i learnt the school management gave us christmas/newyear break which is to last for 3 weeks.(i guess).lol.At that point when it was announced during our lectures i shouted for joy like someone who just won "BABA IJEBU" (lottery).My christmas was really fun,uniting with family and friends was mind blowing and also i met my new fb friend(this is something i swore i was never going to do,cause i have this philosophy that most FB friends are fake) but this particular person proved me wrong...SHOUTOUT TO YOU.                                                                                                                Now i am digressing.lol
Fastforward to 7th january 2014 Oops 2015,it was time for me to return back to school ,my heart started beating/skipping/jumping cause i don't like sitting for hours that is why i love flying (for my mind).LOL.so i started praying and asking God for his protection unknowingly to me God had a bigger plan for me which were two bigger women that blocked my nostrils and almost killed me during the journey.By 6.30 i woke up,bathed,i refused to eat cause my stomach always misbehaves.Off i went to the park,paid for my ticket and just waited for departure time.Around 7.30 we started writing the manifesto (some of you that has travelled by road know exactly what i am talking about).It got to my turn to write mine with my big eyes i looked at the name at the top of my own and it was a feminine and i just looked up to God and said Nice!"
 Make una start to dey enter now,abi una won reach anambra by 10 pm" the driver screamed at the gorgeous women that were eating.My ticket number was 13 so i was suppoed to be the last set to enter.just as i was about entering a very fat huge dirty igbotic woman came from my back ( igbos please pardon me).Before i  knew it another fat woman also stood up saying she was number 15. how my mouth opened.

My mouth was wide open cause i thought i was sitting next to a young fine lady not knowing that "BIG SHOW" in a females body was going to sit beside me for 9 hours.First of all my mind was telling me to collect my money back and forget about the trip till next year,but it was clearly written in the ticket that once you pay you cannot be refunded.so i gaveup the idea and just decided to relax maybe God will make a way,somewhere,somehow,someplaces,somebus.You know normally three people sits in this portable bus but in this case it was like only 2 women were sitting there cause i was nowhere to be found,this women ass is like Aso rock,their hands like that one mike tyson.jeez! is this what i am going to face today i may drop dead in 10 minutes i said to my self.we got to Toll gate and this fat bluffy women started sleeping with their two mouths open.JESUS IS LORD i screamed inside the bus and all the passengers looked back at me and started paying their condolence visit cause they knew i was going to die before i got to my destination. "this women must have been sent to me from hell"i soliloquized.   My phone in my pocket refused to comeout from my small bag cause of the way i was packed like sardine.i was praying asking God to send angel Gabriel who will just come and rescue me from the pit of hell.God indeed answered my prayer as soon as we got to "ORE" the popular joint for travellers i shouted for joy,can you believe that this women were still sleeping and snooring on my body,i came out of the bus and my hands were stiff,all the  parts of my body including my down below.lol.I ran to the closest eatery cause i was about dropping dead "wetin dey worry you,you wan die abi" the woman selling food said.i hurriedly ate and ran back cause the ghost driver had already finish swallowing hot Eba.back to the hell i came from.I returned back to that sardine bus only to find out that one of of that hell sent women had reached her destination. Immediately i got to my destination in Anambra state,i ran to my lodge like someone who was called to partcipate in the next Bigbrother show and the next thing off i went to the  nearest hospital for a checkup to be sure one of my intestine hasn;t be broken.Well with this experience i came to the conclusion that these huge Igbo women needs to be sent to sambisa forest to search for our missing girls.
 Thanks my esteem readers and Happy new year to you all.

Comments

  1. Hello peter,where have you been,omg i miss all your sweet entertaiment gist...lol..
    You even tried to stay alive during the journey.

    ReplyDelete

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